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Well we talked about our time at the first party and we each told one another in intimate detail what we had experienced.

He absolutely loved hearing my description of what it felt like having another man entering me and kept asking me to repeat the story. I knew that he loved me and that his sexual encounter was just his love of variety as is mine.

We both came to the conclusion that we wanted to do this again. Though we had talked in detail before our first experience, we decided to go over the rules again and change anything that needed changing.

We both agreed that there would be no future kissing on the lips anywhere else OK and no unprotected sex.

Oral was fine. If either of us told the other that we had to go there was to be no argument and we get out of there fast. It was also agreed that I would be the one to accept any party or private invitation for any futuree encounters as I would be more level headed and be able to think logically whereas my husband confessed he would probably accept every and all invitations coming our way.

It took a lot more networking and calling around to vouch for the authenticity of the party. That being said my husband and I befriended another couple that had been at the first party and they fit the category I just described.

We became fast friends but not sexual partners. We learned a lot from them and they are the ones who found our second swinging experience with another couple.

That is a story for another time. Bed time everyone Natalie. It sounds like you and your husband are well matched in personalities, so you are both willing to cede to the other if the other does something better.

Your rules make sense and are quite logical. You may have said it in another post, but I don't remember: did either you or you husband have other sexual partners before meeting?

I ask because your husband asked what it was like during penetration for your first out of marriage sexual encounter after getting married. I would think if you had had a lot of partners, it may have been hard to describe in fine detail.

I can actually remember the details of giving oral more than I can having intercourse for the most part. I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.

Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia Register! Comment Post Cancel.

Originally posted by jns View Post. Well that's another great story again Natalie, with husband with your swinging life style. That's how you been able to be involved in the life style for so long with these rules you set forth.

Before jumping in head first with thinking of the ramification of living this life style that's really good for you. But my only question if you could do it all over again.

Would you do anything differently at all Natalie, on living in the swinging life style. When out driving always turn left. Then, should you become lost, you can find your way home by reversing the procedure and always turning right.

Originally posted by Natalie View Post. Yes, I had several partners before getting married. My husband was interested in the sex details of this specific time because this was the first time I'd been with another man since we married which gave him quite a sexual high thinking about it.

Interestingly enough, he never really asked about the men except in general terms that I'd had sex with before we met. He seems only interested in the men I've been with as a married women.

Even today my husband gets very excited when I tell him or write it out for him the details of my intimate encounters. For instance, last night I had my th sexual encounter with a new man.

My husband has been gone for a few days on a business trip to Dallas and he knows I hate to sleep alone. One or two nights is fine but more than that I get very nervous and scared to be alone.

I' a fully independent woman but I feel protected when a man sleeps next to me. As usual when he knows he will be gone for several days like this he suggested I find a "bed mate" for a night or two.

Well instead of calling a friend to come over I happened to meet this young, well educated man who was visiting my company from overseas for some training he's an engineer like my husband.

I never intended to "hook up" with him but to make a long story short it worked out perfectly and I was able to have a man in my bed last night and I slept very soundly.

My husband is due back any minute and I of course am going to have to tell him every dirty detail of what happened last night.

He never ever gets tired of hearing about my exploiting these "poor young men. Originally posted by Motorguy View Post. I'd be a little bit more careful on the couples we have chosen but other than that I'd change nothing.

We've had a few nut cases. Is this going to be a series Natalie - how you got from point a to z type thing? Sounds like it'll make for a good read if so and likely help people in similar situations with doubts.

Originally posted by jen View Post. Good read Wouldn't mind hearing about the biggest nut case you've had. How did you convince your husband to do it?

I didn't start out to make this a series but that's a good idea. There has always been so much misconception about swingers and the lifestyle they lead that it's ridicules what some people think.

I live an absolutely normal life and don't advertise my swinging activities at all, though I'm not ashamed of it I know when to be prudent and quiet about such matters.

So yes, I probably will write about some of my experiences. I finally agreed, so he could get it out of his system. However, as soon as I tried it, I was sold.

Our swinging friends were in all sorts of professions — teachers, doctors, bankers, at-home mums. There was no polyamory, no falling in love, no jealousy.

We attended these parties once or twice a month, and when we went home afterwards, we had the hottest sex. We left swinging for a few years, being busy with our children and work.

After we retired and our children had moved out, we decided it was time to get back out there. The sites had changed, featuring only young women with perfect bodies — not exactly what we are looking for, nor what I have.

We find it difficult to meet couples our age, and often swing with single, straight men. We have rules: no married guys cheating on their wives, no one too young or too old, and no one who supports Trump.

We always use a condom, and we never have sex the first time we meet someone.

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When my husband first suggested it, I was devastated — I thought it meant he wanted to have sex with other women.

He insisted he just wanted to watch me have sex with other men. I finally agreed, so he could get it out of his system.

However, as soon as I tried it, I was sold. Our swinging friends were in all sorts of professions — teachers, doctors, bankers, at-home mums.

There was no polyamory, no falling in love, no jealousy. He suggested that we do the same, but we declined. He asked us about making a playdate, and I told him that I didn't think we had the four-way match we needed for us to be comfortable.

For the rest of the week she was cordial when we'd run into them, but he wouldn't even say hello to us. I felt bad for possibly leading him on.

Unfortunately, that's the way it goes sometimes. Before the trip, I thought swingers were people who would have sex with any random person.

But those we've met want the same thing that we want: friendship with like-minded couples, and if we happen to have fun in sexual ways from time to time, that's a bonus.

Unfortunately, there is not a single lifestyle club in the entire state where we live. We like to be within reach so we can play and talk to each other at the same time.

It's about group play, not just swapping partners. Condoms are a must. We both have veto power, meaning that if there is a man I want to play with, my hubby can say no at any time for any reason and it will not happen, whether he's not comfortable with the guy or isn't interested in playing with his wife.

We rarely play at our house, but if we do it is only with a couple we know really well, and never in our bed—that is only for us.

We talk to several couples we met on the cruise on a weekly basis. One we've become really good friends with, and we get together often with our kids.

We do the same things other families do but sometimes, after the kids are in bed, we lock the door and get naked.

Sometimes we start with a dinner date and drinks, or just hang out with the kids until they're all asleep. We might play a game like sexy dice or watch a movie with sexual undertones.

We haven't had a successful session yet with another couple where we both had penetrative sex. My husband overthinks it and can't maintain an erection.

We have talked to several other men in the lifestyle and they all said that it is very common in the beginning, especially if you've been exclusively with your partner for a long time.

Neither of us have any romantic feelings for our play partners at all, but we do see them as friends. There are definitely people we are attracted to, both mentally and physically, but romance and love are just for us.

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